Monday, March 29, 2010

FAQ's

When I think of geography class, images of maps, countries, and capitals fill my mind.  All I remember from geography is taking those silly country tests where I struggled to fill in the blank map with the appropriate countries.  The Middle East and central Asia (where every country seems to end with “-stan”) always induced an immediate headache.  The places we talked about in class always seemed so distant.

Well, I have been blessed with the opportunity to (hopefully) make the SPLHS Geography Class a bit more interesting.  They recently began their unit on China and asked me to correspond with them to help “bring the lesson alive.”  The students submitted some of their questions about China, and I have done my best to answer them.  I thought many of you might have some of the same questions, so I wanted to share with you.

Here are a few of their FAQ’s (I apologize for the length of some of the responses… I’m getting long-winded in my old age : )

1. What are some of the customs in China?
Every country has unique customs, and China definitely has many of its own.  Here are a few of my favorites:
a) Gatherings: Many people gather in the city parks or small courtyards.  There is always a group of people playing board games, doing exercises together, or dancing.  I enjoy walking through the parks and seeing all the people spending time together.  Of course, I usually wear my headphones because there is always the token “band” that belts out old school Chinese ballads.  Bless their hearts, the musicians are so cute!  The band is a conglomerate of elderly people, most of whom can’t read the music their eyes are so bad.  The men sit in a semi-circle playing their instruments, which are really old, unique and look so cool.  Then, the signature old woman stands in front of them, screaming the high-pitched notes that could only belong to a Chinese opera.  Her voice is shrill and ear piercing.  Hence, I’ve decided that I enjoy the experience much more by watching them, while listening to my own music : )  


b) Dinner: There is a very strict procedural process when going out to dinner.  If a person invites you to dinner, there are several implications: the waitress will only bring one menu and will hand it to the person sitting in the ‘power seat.’  This person will order the food (all meals here are family-style, so you never order your own dish).  The dishes are brought to the table as soon as they’re prepared, so you begin eating at that point.  The dishes are not served all at once, so it is always miserable when you’re stuffed full and the waitress is just bringing the last dish to the table.  Finally, if someone asked you to dinner, they will pay for the entire meal.  No questions asked.  The Chinese concept is that if you don’t have enough money to pay for your friends to eat, then you shouldn’t ask them to dinner.
c) Tea:  Drinking tea is a main way of socializing and a sign of friendship.  Many people have beautiful tea tables in their homes.  Drinking tea is an intricate process that involves warming the cups, rinsing the tea leaves, smelling the tea, tasting the tea, and finally sipping it (comparative to all the formalities included in wine tasting).  Tea is very important in China, especially in Yunnan, which is famous for it’s pu’er tea.  (I don’t admit this to my Chinese friends, but I’m personally more of a coffee girl).
d) Baby Shower: After having a baby, the mother and the baby have a one-month confinement period. Traditional confinement practices stem from the belief that your body is considered 'out of balance' as you enter a 'cold stage' due to the loss of blood and energy from the birth. The confinement period focuses on re-energizing your body with the 'warmth' that has been lost.  During this time, the woman may not wash her hair, may not bathe or brush her teeth, and she is not allowed any visitors.  At the end of the one-month, in celebration of the child’s first full moon, an unveiling party is held for the mother and baby (like a baby shower).  The baby is then introduced to the extended family and friends.

2. What kind of clothes do people in China wear?
The Chinese fashion sense and style greatly varies from the Western idea of fashion (the difference stems from the cultural concept of beauty).  Chinese women love bows and lace and ridiculously tall heels.  They love “cutesy” stuff.  For example, Anna and I really get a kick out of the popular brand called TeenieWeenie.  It is a brand whose symbol is a teddy bear.  Their clothes, most of which is preppy, have this huge boyds bear looking character on the front of it.  And, it is REALLY expensive.  TeenieWeenie would be their equivalent to Abercrombie & Fitch – you know, the logo everywhere and clothes completely overpriced.  It’s just amusing because American women would definitely not wear a huge teddy bear on their shirt
     My perspective may be a bit skewed because I live in Southwest China; the styles here are obviously different than in Beijing and Shanghai (think NYC and LA compared to Missouri).  However, in Yunnan, many western people say that “anything goes” as far as fashion. Your clothes don’t have to match; you can wear leggings of any color under any clothes; etc etc.  My friend Denise always says, “I’m really worried that one day I will think these styles are normal.  Please don’t ever let me get to that point!”  haha.  (On the flip side of this, I’m sure they think I have terrible fashion sense as well.  It’s all about perspective).
     In Yunnan, there is another component to fashion because this region has many minority groups.  Each minority has very distinct clothing and dress.  For example, many of their apparel is hand-woven; they often wear headdresses; and the patterns and colors are often unique to each minority group. 

Kelly, Devon, and I with two minority women in their traditional dress.

3. What is your daily schedule?
My daily schedule consists of work and class.  I usually wake up around 7:30am, immediately turn on the coffee pot, and lounge around my apartment for a bit.  This is a great time to chat with family/friends from home because it is your evening.  Skype convos are always a great way to start my day : )  Then, I go to work until early afternoon; at this time, I leave work and go to my Chinese class.  After class, I go back to the office and work a few more hours. 

4. Do Chinese children speak English?
Chinese children are required to take English classes beginning in elementary school.  Their English study is very important because there is an English portion on their college entrance exam.  With China’s total population of 1.3 billion people, entrance into college is competitive; therefore, students must perform well on the exam, including the English part.  (NOTE: for this reason, CWEF sponsors a Summer English Program for the English teachers in rural schools.  These village teachers often lack a foundational knowledge of English, which greatly inhibits their students’ chances of performing well on the English section of the college entrance exam.  Our Summer English Program includes three weeks of training where American short-term volunteers introduce English teaching methods and lesson plans to the teachers.  It also is a great way to serve these rural Chinese teachers and to develop meaningful relationships with them).
     Interestingly enough, just because the students study English does not necessarily mean they can speak it.  Like most foreign languages, it is much easier to read text than to speak orally or uphold a conversation.  Therefore, many people here don’t “speak” English.  Most are familiar with basic vocabulary words, but unless they are English majors, they hesitate to try to converse in English (and I don’t blame them! haha)

5. What kind of food do you eat?
I feel blessed to have the opportunity to eat a variety of cuisines in Kunming.  First and foremost, I eat Chinese food.  It is so delicious and so cheap!  (and much to my surprise, the polar opposite of American Chinese food).  Some of my favorite Chinese dishes include: grandmother potatoes, goat cheese – the only type of cheese produced in China, fried and coated red beans, cabbage, bean sprouts, skillet fried beef with green peppers, and of course, fried rice and rice noodles.
      Kunming also has a handful of international restaurants I can go to when I’m craving something familiar.  There are a few restaurants with pizza, hamburgers, salads, and sandwiches.  And I am LOVING the Indian and Korean restaurants in Kunming.  Unfortunately I haven’t discovered any good bbq or mexican food.  Tell Biffles they better be sure the smoker is fired up when I get home; and Kbar better make every night taco night : )
     As far as cooking at home, I basically just make vegetable curry, egg sandwiches, steamed or sautéed vegetables, or ramen noodles.  Quite the variety, huh?  I have this fear of purchasing meat at the market because the smell alone is enough to make me gag; and the sight of it… well, we shouldn’t even go there.  Obviously, no meat inhibits the menu a bit.  Combined with the fact that I usually don’t have any energy when I get home, making a quality dinner is usually out of the question.  It’s kind of sad because I love to cook, but I just don’t know where to start… everything here is so different.  Don’t worry though, I recognize it’s an area of my life in need of improvement.  Luckily, I have a Chinese friend who owns a couple of restaurants, and he has promised to teach me how to cook a few basic Chinese dishes.  

6. Where do you get your water from?
Tap water in China is contaminated and should never be drunk.  Therefore, no one uses it.  Everyone in China: restaurants, hotels, homes, businesses, (with the exception of rural villages), have a Culligan-like water machine.  There are water companies (like Culligan) that you buy your water from.  These companies store hundreds of jugs of water in warehouses, and whenever you need more water, you call them and ask them to deliver another jug of Culligan water to your home. (One jug of water costs about $1 USD).  It’s really great because the water machines have the hot/cold spouts, so you can have instant hot or cold water.  Love it.

7. Do you drive in China?
Unfortunately for me (fortunately for the environment), I don’t drive in China.  My foot hasn’t hit the gas pedal since last August.  It is a sensitive topic because I truly adore/miss my little Camry.  Growing up in Concordia, you become quite dependent on your car; whether you drive to the city to go out to dinner and see a movie, drive to Warrensburg to go to Wal-Mart, or drive to the lake to go shopping (one of my favorite things to do), you are always driving somewhere.  In college, I was just as addicted to my car; we went on road trips to Colorado, Florida, Texas, Memphis, Washington D.C. and Virginia.  And then I moved to China.
     Here, I take the public bus everywhere.  It costs about $0.13 to take the bus anywhere in the city.  Bargain, right?!  It is a great deal; however, the people pushing to get on the bus, the lack of personal space, and the noise alone is enough to deter even the most patient person.  Teasing, kind of.  It really isn’t that bad.  (although when I’m having a bad China day, I avoid the bus at all costs).  Mainly I take the bus; sometimes I take a taxi, and I often walk.  I’m really blessed that my office is close enough to my apartment that I walk to work every day.
Oh and consider yourself forewarned, I’m going to be a crazy driver when I get home from lack of practice.  If you see my black Camry cruising down main street, watch out! 

8. Where do you live?
I live with my Chinese roommate in a 7-story brick apartment building.  Thankfully, we live on the second floor : )  The apartment has a really nice bay window in the living room, 3 bedrooms, 1 bath, a kitchen, and a small laundry room.  Like most Chinese apartments, it doesn’t have any closets and the kitchen is very small.  I do have a western toilet, a shower, and a bathtub (most bathrooms have a squatty potty and don’t have a tub).  If I do say so myself, my apartment is beautiful.  I am so blessed to live in a nice home.  It’s not clean right now, but I’ll post pictures eventually : )

9. What is the climate like where you live?
Kunming is nicknamed the “Eternal City of Spring” because of its year-round spring-like temperatures and constantly blooming flowers.  The average climate is approximately 60 degrees Fahrenheit, and the elevation is over 1 mile above sea-level (higher than Denver).  The city is bordered by mountains on three sides of the city (which I can see from my office window) and a lake on the other side.
      Don’t be deceived though… it can get REALLY cold here in the winter because none of the buildings have indoor heating.  During these times, it is actually warmer outside than inside.  (For a few weeks in November, I wore 5+ layers of clothing 24 hours a day, and I only showered when I had to (gross, I know) because the water was so cold – we have solar heating; so when the sun doesn’t shine we don’t have hot water).  Overall though, the sun is bright, the skies are blue, and the flowers are beautiful.  A great place to live!

10. What is your favorite thing about China?
Hands down, my favorite thing about China is the people.  Chinese people are so wonderful and warm.  They are gracious, caring, kind, and loyal.  Everyone I have met has gone out of his/her way to help me and has repeatedly shown me kindness.  My Chinese co-workers, my Chinese roommate and her boyfriend, my Chinese teachers, the Chinese lady who sells me yogurt from her little shop everyday, the Chinese people on the bus who offer me their seat as a sign of hospitality, the Chinese girl on the street last week who walked with me to the international post office after I asked her for directions, the lady at my neighborhood restaurant who knows my take-out order by heart (sad reality, haha!).  He has truly blessed my life here with each and every one of these people.  It has been so amazing to feel their love and kindness.  I just pr-y that they feel it reciprocated.


Saturday, March 27, 2010

Chinese Culture

Because I am not an expert on cross-cultural relationships, I’m going to rely on the Peace Corps Cross-Cultural Workbook and a book called, “It’s All Chinese To Me” to help explain a few of the many cultural components.

The Peace Corps' Cross Cultural workbook states, "Culture has been aptly compared to an iceberg. Just as an iceberg has a visible section above the waterline, and a larger, invisible section below the water line, so culture has some aspects that are observable and others that can only be suspected, imagined, or intuited.  Also like an iceberg, that part of culture that is visible (observable behavior) is only a small part of a much bigger whole.

A few examples:


Observable Behaviors

Underlying Cultural Components
Food

Values
Clothes

Importance of Time
Gestures

Concept of Self
Holiday Customs

Rules of Social Etiquette
Music

Concept of Personal Space
Art

Leadership Ideas
Literature

Work Ethic
Facial Expressions

Concept of Beauty


You can see that there is a relationship between some of the items that appear above the waterline and those that appear below it.  In most cases, the invisible aspects of culture influence or cause the visible ones.  For example, the concept of beauty is clearly manifested in the style of clothes; and rules of social etiquette are portrayed through gestures and facial expressions." 

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Culturally, China and the United States are extremely different.  In most cultural aspects, China is on one side of the spectrum and the U.S. is on the other end. 

The most distinct cultural issues I have experienced include: the concept of time, the concept of self (individualists v. collectivists), and communication styles (direct v. indirect, and the importance of “face” and relationships).

As someone who values punctuality, efficiency, and organization, I admit that there are days that I struggle with the Chinese concept of time.  In America, “time is money” right?!  Schedules, deadlines, and to-do lists, fill our lives.  We expect people to be on time, and we anticipate that things will go according to plan.  Unfortunately, China (rural China especially) has the converse idea of time.  Time here is focused on people and relationships, rather than on tasks or appointments.  Plans are always changing, and scheduling something in advance is literally unheard of.  (For example, you should usually not book a plane ticket more than three weeks in advance; and school holidays or start/end dates are never set more than a month prior to the date).  Schedules often seem unreliable, and plans are always subject to change.  For this reason, many aspects of life feel unpredictable (definitely not good for my Type A personality; although, I am really learning to let go of the control and be a little more relaxed… I know the ross street girls won't believe this, but for real  : )

Personal identity is another major difference between China and America.  Americans are classified as individualists because we value independence and self-sufficiency.  A person should not rely on anyone but themself.  We have mottos such as, “Stand on your own two feet,” “Look out for number one,” and “Pull yourself up by your own bootstraps.”  Americans encourage their children to think for themselves and to make their own decisions.

On the other hand, Chinese people are usually collectivists.  Their identity is based on their role and membership within a group (family, friends, work).  The needs of the group come before one’s personal needs.  Interdependence is valued and desired.  If you are a member of a group, expect that your fellow members will do anything for you (and they expect that it be reciprocated) – loan you money, allow you to live in their home, help raise their children, etc.  (I experienced this when my co-worker offered to sell me her bike.  She insisted that I only pay half of her asking price; the reason being that we were coworkers and friends – part of the same group).  Conversely, if you do not belong to the group, do not expect people to assist you. 
(Side note: this is why our service projects make such an impact.  The villagers cannot comprehend why we would help them because we are not part of their group). 

The importance of group membership is highlighted in another major cultural component in China: relationships (or guanxi).  Relationships are the key aspect in Chinese culture.  Without relationships, you have no influence, “pull” or connections. (This is true in many cultures; think along the same lines as our motto, “It’s not what you know, it’s who you know,” but the significance is magnified by a million in China).  In China it is not just about who you know; it is also how the other person sees his or her obligations toward you.  The more favors you do for someone, the more obligations they have toward you – and vice versa.  Returning favors is paramount to maintaining one’s web of relationships.  Failure to reciprocate a favor, no matter what they ask, is committing a major moral transgression (It’s All Chinese to Me).  Without guanxi, it is nearly impossible to get anything done in China.

Communication styles are another fundamental difference between China and the United States (another thing I struggle with).  As Americans, we practice direct communication.  We adhere to sayings such as, “Don’t beat around the bush” and “Tell it like it is.”  Again, China is on the opposite end of the spectrum because people are indirect communicators.  Saving face/not losing face takes precedence over the truth; maintaining harmony is the overriding goal of the communication exchange.  Confrontation is avoided.  Criticism is handled very delicately, and people rarely respond with a straightforward no.  What a person says and what a feels are often not the same.  (Peace Corps Culture Matters) 

Here in lies the ever-important concept of “face.”  Difficult to specifically define, “face” includes a person’s pride, dignity, reputation, and self-esteem.  A person can either gain face from a positive situation or lose face from a negative situation.  In China, it is very important to not cause someone to lose face.  If you cause someone to lose face, even if it is unintentional, your friendship, customer/client relationship will severely suffer.  A person should take great lengths to ensure this doesn’t happen.

Here are some examples from “It’s All Chinese To Me” of how to gain face and how to lose face, respectively.

Ways to Gain Face (you’ll notice that some of these are very similar to our idea of achieving success in America):
1.     Give someone a sincere compliment
2.     Praise someone publicly
3.     Treating someone to a meal (which is why we often take our work partners out to dinner; and also why I feel pressure to "act right" and be culturally sensitive during dinner... which also means that I cannot refuse food when someone offers it. Saying 'No' is incredibly rude and will cause someone to lose face.  Don't worry, I've discovered the trick of burying the food that I don't like in my rice - one of the positives of only eating out of a bowl).
4.     Going out of one’s way to do something for a friend
5.     Receiving an expensive gift, especially an imported one
6.     Being wealthy
7.     Earning a degree from a prestigious university
8.     Marrying well
9.     Having a son
10.  Having a successful child

Ways to Lose Face:
1.     Not showing respect to elders or authority figures
2.     Criticizing someone publicly
3.     Turning down an invitation with an outright “No.”  In China, there are 3 proper ways to say no: a) Maybe; b)Yes, maybe; and c)I will discuss it with so and so.
4.     Interrupting someone when they are talking
5.     Threatening to fire someone or actually firing them (Donald Trump and The Apprentice definitely never gained popularity in China : )
6.     Exposing someone for lying
7.     Becoming angry with someone
8.     Not being able to do something
9.     Admitting to having made a mistake.  Try to avoid forcing anyone into doing this.  Always leave them a way out, even if it means accepting a lie.  (NOTE: I recently experienced this with one of my coworkers.  I recognized that there was an error in a document we were working on; rather than directly stating, “that number is wrong; it should be ___.”  I delicately brought it to their attention by saying, “I think I made a mistake and told you this number, but maybe we should try another number).”
10.  Admitting to not knowing something can also result in a serious loss of face.  Often, misleading information is given as a means of preserving face. (Hence, why I NEVER trust a Chinese person when they give me directions! lol).

As you can see, the cultural adjustments to living in China encompass about every aspect of daily life.  Some days it is incredibly frustrating and mindboggling, but it is so interesting to experience how differently things work in China (for better and for worse).